Where you look you go

I'm a firm believer that we create our reality in a sense that the things we focus on are the things that happen, whether we are focusing on what we do or don't want.

Where we send our gaze is where our attention goes.

On a workshop this weekend I learnt more about Drishti (the gazing point) in Ashtanga yoga and how each pose has a Drishti associated with it. When you practice following this your mind is not allowed to wander off around the room because it is following your gaze, focused on these set points.The movement of yoga becomes more meditative as your awareness turns inwards. Being reminded of this has led me on to think about our gaze in a broader sense. 

I recently returned from a surf trip to Portugal where my partner and I spent most of the time messing around in the waves near the surf schools (because it was too big for us out back!). The one thing we could continuously hear the instructors saying was 'you go where you look!'. I have been told this countless times when surfing. I've also told my yoga students this, especially when trying poses like Crow - you know that if you look down you'll fall on your face! The exact same words were repeated in the yoga studio during the workshop on the Drishti.

The significance with this in all aspects of our lives are huge. From a physical perspective, your body will move in the direction of your gaze. When practicing sport whether weight lifting or shooting a hoop, you keep your gaze up and on the target otherwise you will fall over or not know where to aim for. So how do we forget this fact in day to day life? 

It's taken me a long time to realise that the thoughts that occupy our minds are the ones that become the reality, because these are the thoughts we are living. I guess this is where mindfulness / meditation / focus can help you to clear your mind, but I think it requires real understanding in order to conquer the power of our attention. It also requires strength - dragging your awareness away from the things that scare you is hard as it is natural to keep your eye on the enemy! But as with all things in life, there has to be balance. 

On the flip side, being able to focus on what you do want and really, truly believe in it happening... maybe that's where the magic begins...?!! 

To Keep Calm and Carry On?

I've been thinking a lot recently about an article I read on 'why lying broken in a pile on your bedroom floor is a good idea'. I've had different view points on this depending on where I'm at in my life. I see people every day coping with massive challenges and just 'getting on with it', and yet I also see people hiding their problems only to find they explode later on. What is the best way?

We live in a culture where we are proud to 'Keep Calm and Carry On', despite the challenges we meet along the way. We try not to burden others with our problems and we try our hardest not to let the cracks show. But sometimes this is the worst possible thing to do. There are times in life when you just need to keep going. However, when the emotion builds up it needs a release, whether it's through talking to a friend, exercising, doing something creative. A lot of the time we hold on just long enough and then let go in an unhealthy way through drinking, eating or partying (excessively), and then carry on again doing the same thing we were doing before  and feeling the same way. There is no change, just keep going, escape a little, keep going. 

As a culture, we often look at vulnerability as a weakness and try not to show it. We think we should 'carry on' because that's what we have been indoctrinated to do! However, letting yourself to break down is empowering because it allows you to build yourself up again, and that's when the fun starts. My favourite line from a song is 'when you have nothing you have nothing to lose', I have been on the best adventures and had the most amazing experiences as a result of this mindset, using the downs to fuel me on to the ups and help me change the situation. Embrace the collapse because when you are broken, when you have nothing... you have all the possibilities and nothing holding you back! 

There is a Hindu goddess called Akhilandeshwari, 'The Goddess of Never Not Broken', who teaches us this important lesson. She is in constant flux, breaking apart, spinning herself into a whirlwind in an attempt to get closer to God, and riding a crocodile as a symbol of the fear inside us, our reptilian brain. Rather than give in to this fear she rides it. And rather than hold it all together, she embraces the breaking apart and uses her fear to literally ride forward in her life. 

So, I don't think 'Keep Calm and Carry On' is a very good mantra! Fall apart, embrace the fear, and move forward every time! Life isn't about carrying on it's about change, and without challenge there wouldn't be any change.